Without any uncertainty or mystery, you end up launching yourself straight to the plateau of a relationship without the build-up. It’s a part of how relationships progress; the initial inability to keep your hands off of each other and that new relationship energy starts to fade and becomes something calmer and more intimate.However, “fade” isn’t the same as “disappears altogether” and that spark can be reignited and maintained with some effort on the part of the couple. One of the mistakes that couples make that smothers passion is that they get too comfortable with one another.They ramble out of control because they’re so desperate to fill any possible silence with noise. He can’t deal with the potential that she might catch each other on phone becomes an opportunity to vomit his neediness all over the place and kill any excitement Nikki might have felt at seeing him again.
As Weir puts it: “Because not even science could mimic that awful, wonderful buzz of early uncertainty—is he going to call, is she going to say yes?Once you’re settled and secure in a relationship, there’s a tendency to start taking one another for granted.Now that their presence is more or less guaranteed, the sex is on tap and you can be sure that if they immediately respond to your text, they will when they’re less busy, there’s less of a motivation to keep up the standards.It’s the difference between someone who’s confident in themselves and someone who’s self-esteem is entirely dependent on what other people think. , a reminder of who he is, where they met and what happened. The ambiguousness of the situation – the uncertainty of whether she will actually call him – is too much.Someone who’s needy will that fact early and often; they frequently can’t handle any sort of ambiguity. Calling back a second time is the start of the deluge of neediness that ultimately snatches defeat from the jaws of victory.